Twenty Twelve

I brought Princess Nell home to San Jose, with the promise of taking her biking around the beautiful, chilly scenery of northern California. Of course, then it rained torrentially for a few days, and then winter hibernation laziness kicked in... so Nell has been neglected for two weeks :( 

The sun was finally out for an extended period of time today, and I seized the opportunity to do some neighborhood exploring. Biking by myself always leads me to thinky thoughts; something about a little solitude in motion gets my mental cogs turning like pinwheels. 

So here are a few casual thoughts on my year 2012, inspired by some lovely sights from my afternoon bike ride. 

bridge that crosses over to the neighboring golf course and explorable areas

some tall grass

I LOVE CRUNCHY LEAVES

Leaves

When I was little, sometimes I used to pretend that leaves were paper currency. (leaves and bills are both green, ok, kid Elaine wasn't that crazy). At recess, or at the park, or while camping, I would collect leaves of all types until I had stacks on stacks... and when I was content with the amount of money I had laboriously "made", I would just leave it in a pile, wherever I was. 

Looking back, either I really was crazy as shit or this was my little child-minded way of paying back nature... saying thank you via a tangible offering. As I recount my 2012, I realize that this year has brought me many amazing feats of nature to be thankful for. 

     --There was the Honors camping trip... where I witnessed the brightest moon I had seen in a long time, and the sheer grandness of giant boulders heaped upon each other all the way to heaven.

     --There was the beach escapade in Laguna...where I witnessed the strength of the ocean as it pulled at my legs and the strength of the sun as it glared a vibrant orange during sundown.  

     --There was the summer I spent in the remote beauty of rural Taiwan...where I witnessed silent fog blanket lush green mountains, a lake inspired by the sun and moon, and the whispered secrets of a bamboo forest. 

     --There was the weekend I spent camping in Joshua Tree... where I witnessed stars falling to earth, and the fairylike trails that they leave behind them. 

So with this pile of leaves, I offer my thanks. Thank you, nature, for making my 2012 wonderful with scenery and trees and meteor showers and seasons and sunlight and the carbon dioxide cycle. You're the best. 

Nell stops to commune with nature

a winding path

Pathways

I've come to notice that most walking paths are curved. Why? My theory is that it ensures a more interesting and varied range of vision for the person doing the walking. If you're walking, and you can see straight ahead of you to where exactly you're going to be in 10, 20, 50 steps... then your walk suddenly becomes a lot less exciting. The thrill of what's around the corner is lost, and you'll probably find yourself turning around and going home a lot quicker than if your path looked like the one pictured above.

It's like why paragraph breaks exist- nobody really enjoys reading a wall of text.

So if most literal paths are curved, why do we so often demand that our metaphorical life paths be direct ? Why are we in such a hurry to know what the next big thing in our lives is ? Why do we demand straight answers from a God who is creative and artistic in nature ? These are all things that I had to come to grips with in 2012. With college graduation just around the riverbend one moment, and behind me the next, the natural question is "what now? what next?" In 2012, I learned how to be inquisitive, not demanding. I added a double major out of pure enjoyment of the subject. I dropped everything and went to Taiwan for a summer. I went on night drives along winding roads to calm turbulent thoughts. I let God speak to me in mountains and forests and smiling faces, and he answered many of my questions in answers phrased just as beautifully as the surroundings I had stopped to listen in.

Creeks

As far as I'm concerned, creeks are pretty much awesome. They're kind of like classrooms, but more interactive. A creek can teach any range of things that young kids learn in an elementary school science class, like the food chain, buoyancy, tadpole metamorphosis... all in a very organic manner. Sometimes it's just easier to learn something when you're directly immersed in it. 

This is something that was the core foundation of my beloved small group, Skittens. As the standalone co-ed small group in the entire ministry, and with no real paradigm to model our studies after, we were definitely an ongoing live experiment. My dear co-leader and I wanted to create a place of openness, of inquisitive minds, and of occasionally reckless behavior. Essentially, we wanted the group to be like a creek: a place to be curious, to poke around and ask questions, to learn how to skip rocks, and to get your feet a little wet. Time says we succeeded, because we ended the year with a cohesive and loving family of small group members, and I wanted to let each of them know that they've also taught me so much in return. 

wise-looking tree

dendrites !

Branches

This year, I learned that the word "dendrites" comes from the Greek word for "branches". (this piece of trivia came about from having a boyfriend who looks at slices of brain cells all day) Dendrites are those little gangly things in your neurons that listen to all the incoming thought traffic that goes on in your brain. Without them, your kidney or eyelid or whatever body part could be knocking all day, and no one would ever answer the door. 

The aforementioned gentleman and scholar that enlightened me to this piece of information is another significant happening of my 2012. He gave me the opportunity to branch out-- to speak up, to take a risk, and to be vulnerable with emotions that I might otherwise have kept on lock and key. Once I started extending those branches, I was then given even more opportunities-- to explore places I've never been, to speak a language I've never spoken, and to experience love from a different spiritual background.

I found some mushrooms here

heading up to the terrace!

Fences

Every time I come home to San Jose, I go from Elaine the young, wild, and free...to Elaine the 22-year old with a curfew and mandated bedtime of 12 midnight. This is, of course, absolutely maddening. I graduated college this year ! Shouldn't that count for something ? I'm practically an adult, right ? These imposed boundaries have occasionally led to me stewing under the covers at the click of midnight, knowing that my peers are out living the night.

However, just because my diploma is labeled 2012, thus releasing me from the constraints and burdens of student life, it doesn't necessarily mean that I've been released out into the metaphorical adulthood pasture. These restrictions that my parents place on me are not meant to deprive me of the joys of life; rather, they are there to keep me close to home, so I can continue learning how to be patient, observant, and appreciative of what is on the other side.

peace out 2012! thanks for the good times!

The 2012 UCI Medal- A Celebration of Stars

 A few weeks ago, I had the privilege of spending an evening in the gorgeously transformed grounds of the Bren Events Center, volunteering at the annual UCI Medal. Upon entering the building, I could not even believe that I was inside the Bren. The last time I was in the building was for my own commencement ceremony back in June, and it was completely unrecognizable.

Of course, my camera phone does not do the interior justice.

A luxe white carpet ushered guests into the lobby, where they were greeted by a small waterfall, bouquets of white orchids, and shimmery, peach-colored satins. The inside of the gymnasium was even more beautiful; the room was filled with a hundred round tables, each perfectly set with formal diningware and accented with long, cylindrical vases of white florals. Long, tasseled curtains were hung from the ceiling, creating a tenuous wall of white fabric between the banquet hall and the dancefloor. Faux chandeliers made of large gold sequins were hung from the ceiling, reflecting glittering lights across the room as they turned slowly in the air. Even the restrooms were decorated to fit the theme, with smooth river stones lining the sinks, and glass orbs hanging from the ceiling, each housing one or two delicate flowers.

Yes, I took a photo of the ladies' restroom

I can only think to describe the Medal as the Nobel Awards of UCI, a chance to recognize the greatest contributors to the success and prestige of the University. As a student ambassador with AAN I was not formally invited as a guest, but as a volunteer, and was thus committed to being on my feet and on call for the duration of the event. I had no issues with this at all, however, as I was still able to experience much of the glamor of the night, as well as engage with various attendees while carrying out my duties.

As photo assistants, Kevin and I were among the first guests to see the medalists. Upon their arrival they were ushered into a private photo room to have portraits taken with their friends, colleagues, and of course, their medals. I got to meet Chancellor Drake's very charming wife for the first time, as I held onto some of her personal belongings- a plain black tweed clutch, and a navy blue folder containing drafts of her husband's speeches- during the picture taking sessions.

The entire night proceeded like a charm. Entertainment was provided by UCI's very own, as musicians, dancers, and singers from the Claire Trevor School of the Arts took to the stage to present their tributes to all our University stands for- light, leadership, innovation- through song and dance.

Official UCI photo

The most emotional moment of the night for me was hearing the very poignant and thankful speech given by medal recipient Professor Elizabeth Loftus. She began by recounting her experiences at her previous school, and the often difficult nature of her line of research. True, heartfelt appreciation for the nurturing and supportive environment of UCI showed through as her voice cracked, explaining how even as a young University, UCI not only accepted but fervently supported her research findings. Now one of the most celebrated professionals in the field of psychology and memory, Professor Loftus still cried tears of joy as she proudly exclaimed how glad she is to be part of such an inspiring community of University colleagues and students.

It was not only the words of her speech itself that touched me, but also the fact that her words made me look back at my own experience at UCI. In my second year, I took an Honors Social Science course that touched upon the research of Professor Loftus. I remembered staying up a few late nights in ripped sweatpants and t-shirts, furiously studying her texts for an upcoming exam... Learning about the great strides she had made in the field: planting memories, getting people to vividly describe things that never happened, and dramatically transforming the way witness questioning is performed and recorded.

Now, over two years later, I am sitting in black-tie formal attire, in a luxuriously decorated room that once held a thousand of my fellow Humanities colleagues and their families, listening to a moving speech by the very same inspiring woman whose works I pored over in the dim light of my VDC Norte bedroom... and I experienced such a feeling of fulfillment, as if things had come full circle.

How great it is that UCI so enthusiastically supports its own, and makes its students aware of the amazing work that is done by its professors and faculty... and how great it is that UCI so enthusiastically brings back its sentimental alumna- like yours truly- to experience the pride and joy of the University at such an event as this.

AAN volunteer team

1982

I went thrifting with my aunt yesterday :)

The last time I went thrifting was probably in last-minute desperation for an oddly specific costume piece or accessory (80's themed dinner party? murder mystery?), or at home in San Jose, where my mother frequents the grounds of the Capitol flea market.

Walking through the aisles reminded me how much I love thrifting...especially swap meets. Beyond the crowds, weird smells, and overpriced, broken junk, there are truly interesting things to be found... both tangible and otherwise.

While browsing aisles of run-down lawn equipment, one-dollar clothing piles, used tires, and once-loved plush animals, I spotted one vendor that was selling old books. The unemployed English major thrives on foraging such grounds, and it wasn't long before I was at a kneel in front of dilapidated cardboard boxes, digging through hardcovers and softcovers and books without covers.

Among fascinating titles that I brought home for myself (The Illustrated Encyclopedia of the Universe, The Gatefold Book of the World's Greatest Warplanes, This is Not a Book, and George Orwell's famous  dystopian novel 1984) were scattered a considerable myriad of outdated anthologies. A Guiness World Records volume from the early 90's. A collection featuring TIME magazine's greatest photos...from the year 2000. A bridal magazine that certainly dated itself with its cover- a voluminous, Farrah-haired blonde wearing a puff-sleeved gown. A Garden Grove High School yearbook- 1982.

On a whim, I decided to flip through the yearbook. The first page informed me that its previous owner was a girl named Jodie, and the following pages unfolded a surprising amount of detail on Jodie's life and persona, as well as life in the early 80's. A poll of the student body revealed that the most popular band of the year was Journey, and the most popular album was "Captured", released the previous year in 1981. Prom dresses were hideous, feathery, puff-sleeved creations. Photo montages featured faded denim, leather jackets, and orange turtlenecks. The handwritten notes reveal the excellent penmanship of a generation that grew up on manuscript, not on the computer keyboard.

Some things never change, though... the cheer captain was the same girl who won homecoming queen. There was a whole section of Nguyens. The marching band only got a single page spread in the entire yearbook.

I couldn't help but read through a few of the messages that her friends had left her. It was kind of odd, you get that sneaky-guilt feeling you only get when your friend leaves their email logged in on your computer, and you accidentally click on a message before realizing it's not your account. A lot of Jodie's friends had written about her sweet personality; one guy thanked her for always answering his questions in class, and another girl thanked her for curling her hair at an event. Another girl complimented her on her sense of humor, saying it was "super rad."

Upon realizing it, I flipped to the very back of the book and was glad to find the familiar index of names, organized by class and surname. Starting from the seniors, and then through the juniors, I finally found her name among the sophomores. It was listed that Jodie makes an appearance on two pages in the yearbook, so I memorized the two numbers and turned back through the yellowing pages. In the sophomore section, a black-and-white photo of a very friendly-looking young woman with glasses, fair skin, and a shoulder-length haircut looked back at me. I flipped to the second page, and smiled when I saw that I was looking at the ensemble portrait of the Garden Grove Marching Band and Color Guard.

I know I will likely never meet you, but in that moment, I felt like I did...and I like you, Jodie from 1982, I like you.


____________________

In other news... just for kicks and giggles... here are two of my favorite things I bought today :)

this fantastic hardbound for $2

adorable floral heels for $9

Rainmaker

"Hang out with the world, and you will gain wisdom." 

-Dave Gibbons

I'm not in Irvine often anymore, but today I chose to swing by and catch Sunday service. Today, Dave shared about the concept of the rainmaker, and the drought that comes before the rain.

It reminded me of a "rainmaker" that my mom made for me when I was little. My mom, the ever creative pioneer artist of cheap homemade toys (and this was BEFORE Pinterest and craft blogs !) fashioned a DIY rainstick one day out of an old wrapping paper tube. She poked some short nails (or brads, or something) into the sides of the cardboard, and filled it with beans. I remember being fascinated for hours.

SSSSSSSHHHHHHHHHhhhhhh.....

*flip*

SSSSSSSHHHHHHHHHhhhhhh.....

*flip*

SSSSSSSHHHHHHHHHhhhhhh.....

*repeat*

I'm pretty sure I still have it somewhere in the house :)